Well, I just finished grading another round of Shakespeare exams. As I’ve said before, part of what’s strange about this job is the fact that I’m grading completely out of context, without any contact with the students writing these exams. As I’ve also said before, this makes the reading experience quite a bit different from my normal grading experience: with my own students, I’m usually sad or disappointed when they make mistakes or say things that don’t make sense. With these students, however, I am simply amused. I thought I’d once again share some of the more amusing gems with you, dear readers.
[Disclaimer: By posting these excerpts I do not make any judgment about the intelligence of the writers of the excerpts. I am quite sure that they are all very smart students who were simply stymied by the limits of time, space, and circumstance.]
Some new words to ponder (bonus points for those of you who define them):
- dillusions
- black verse
- descrepid
- hypocritism
- irraticism
And here are some more lengthy musings on Hamlet, a play that seems always to inspire some of the most amusing answers:
[In answer to a question asking students to discuss Polonious's plots and the reasons for their success/failure:]
“His first plot was to have a spy sent to France to check on Laertes, which was in turn successful because he was able to have a spy go and check in about how Laertes truly is.”
[A (sadly, slightly better) answer to the same question:]
“Overall, his plots were weak and obviously failed because he was not very smart.”
And finally, my favorite [Answering a question about how Hamlet deals with a philosophical issue]:
“In Hamlet, certain philosophical questions are asked by Hamlet. Being a play full of questions, Hamlet is a philosophy student. He interprets things by questions. The entire play is dependant [sic] on his overanalyzing and thinking of the plots. As Hamlet continues, he surpasses the question “To be or not to be,” which can easily translate, “to do or not to do.” Hamlet explores the ideas of unknowing questions to any man. In his plays, these philosophical questions are constantly asked.”
This is all the student said about Hamlet in the entire essay. Honestly, I have no fricking clue what anything in that paragraph means. I do, however, like thinking about the idea that Hamlet himself is both a philosophy student and a play full of questions at the very same time. I am also a little bit clearer now about the relationship between being and doing.
Ah. Grading. And now that it’s done, it’s time to move along to that conference paper I have to deliver in less than 48 hours…..
